Be a Door

In her blog, 'Pieces of me," Amanda Owen does such a beautiful job of describing the relationship between a child with extraordinary needs and his or her siblings...she lays out 5 emotions that those siblings can experience on any given day... She then goes on to share the importance for those siblings to help open the way for success and opportunity for their struggling brother or sister.  "Be a door," she says.

The 5 Emotions a Sibling Experiences are highlighted below.  

Guilt- because they have a disability and you do not.  

Jealousy- fighting for parents’ attention is a child thing, but maybe a little more magnified when their sibling has a disability. Along with thinking that their sibling gets the “easy” way out of things such as chores, school work and other responsibilities and we the “typical” developing sibling will always be held to higher expectations.

Embarrassment- it’s not the disability itself that is embarrassing but situations that come along with it. We might always be scanning the room to see if others  are watching or noticing that we do things “different”.

Hate- sometimes it’s just needing to hate the disability, not the person

The 3 P’s (Pride, Protective, Possession)

Pride- that God chose them to be their sibling and the realization that their sibling will teach them more about life than anything.

Protective – becoming the shield that blocks and pushes back the negativity in the world  associated with disabilities.

Possession- the feeling that no one else can support or love their siblings like they can.

 I often worried that my two older children would resent their brother for the attention he demanded, the things that were broken in fits of rage and the drama that we daily endured in our home and in public... And to an extent that is true.  I have no doubt there were times they resented him.  They have had to walk this journey with us and have endured the stress and challenges of having a child in our home with extraordinary needs.  However, what I have seen over the years was not as much resentment but a growing in grace, compassion and empathy... My oldest recently son came home and shared about someone that was struggling at work.  He was frustrated with the lack of patience and empathy he felt the other coworkers were affording him.  He then said that he figured something out.  He just had to find that boy's niche - find an area in which he could shine.  Then he said, "you taught me that, mom..."

Yeah, I'm pretty sure my kids get it in the best way they know how. Be  a door.... ❤️  This was a powerful message.

https://piecesofme.org/2019/05/31/the-emotional-impact-of-being-a-sibling-to-a-brother-sister-with-a-disability/

New Chapters ~ New Adventures

     

     First day of a new adventure and amazing opportunity for this critter lovin' kid. Caleb will be working this summer as a volunteer intern at the Pittsburgh National Aviary. The Aviary has always been such a calming and therapeutic place for him so he has spent countless hours developing relationship with not only the animals but also the docents. 

    

     With a desire to pursue a career in animal care and rescue I can see this being an amazing launching pad to his future. 

#justdoit

#justdoit
He did it...and he ROCKED IT. 😏

Freshman Year comes to a close with a well-deserved 3.5 final GPA.  This year has not been without its hiccups and speed bumps, but start to finish we really could not have asked for more. The fourth quarter especially was met with some challenges as Caleb has begun to transition to the regular co-taught classroom with fewer modifications in Math and English. Because of the depth of content in English he was quickly facing a failing grade. Instead of giving up and getting down on himself as he would have in the past he went on his own to the guidance counselor to seek help, which came as a surprise to us all. He then began working even harder to bring that grade up and finish strong.  Caleb has had an AMAZING team of support extending all the way to administration. Their dedication and commitment to Caleb's success has been overwhelmingly evident.  So blessed by the support and care Caleb has been surrounded with and so proud of HIM. He has shown so much courage and determination this year and his progress continues to amaze us. 

Caleb has grown so much this year and has worked so hard. He has increasingly gained more and more independence and has started to advocate more for himself, taking ownership for his part of the journey. The progress he's made has been so significant that his IEP team actually began removing and limiting modifications and have also recommended that he be placed in the regular classroom for all classes next year. Although this will provide new challenges, I have no doubt God will give the grace to help him rise above it.

The principal commented in a parting email that he believed that Caleb had shown more courage this year than most and on another occasion had told me how much he is inspired by him. I am too. Caleb is one of the strongest and bravest young men I know.

Just keep climbing, son... Can't wait to see your story unfold. ♥️

... To be continued

*** Miracles Do Happen ***

     If you don't think miracles can occur through chiropractic care, I can assure you , they most certainly do... and they are... Every day... About a year and a half ago, our son began his own miraculous journey with the McFaddens' Neurosensory Program that completely changed his direction and path for the better. His most recent report card is part of the proof. All A's and B's for the 3rd quarter IN A ROW and a 3.6 GPA 👊... Every single teacher comment pointed to consistent positive effort, a cooperative attitude and good participation during class instruction. That may not seem extraordinary at first glance, but for this kid it is. I pulled up a fairly recent report card to reflect on the difference and saw it riddled with ONLY negative comments...

*Lacks self-control

*Uncooperative

*Does not accept direction/help

*Disrespectful

     At the end of his 2nd grade year, he was diagnosed with autism, attention deficits, cognitive and developmental delays, and learning disabilities. No longer is he being identified with those behaviors and limitations, and the stigma of his diagnoses and labels are continuing to fade away. Even our son notices the difference more and more as he begins to experience new personal milestones. He even recently told his psychologist that for the first time in 15 years, he feels like a "normal kid."

We are continually in awe and full of gratitude at not only the progress he has made already but continues to make. Within the past few months, he received his 2nd degree black belt rank in martial arts, participated in his school's musical and has continued to experience an increase in self-confidence. We are now beginning to see a much more independent young man who is taking more personal responsibility for his own path, advocating for himself and openly accepting guidance and direction when needed. He is doing his school work and projects more independently and has a clearer understanding of coursework content. I used to imagine a future with constant support and never-ending struggle... But now?... Training wheels are off and he is flying. At the rate he's riding, any destination is possible. 

So I would say a resounding, "Yes." Miracles do happen through chiropractic, the discipline of self-care and good nutrition. Our son is one example, as are many others that have already and will continue to pass through their doors.

McFadden Chiropractic

A Star is Born

     

    

     This weekend we had the overwhelming joy of sitting back and watching our Caleb experience one of the biggest milestones in his life as he performed in Seneca Valley's Hello Dolly musical.

It has been so rewarding to watch him navigate this whole process with so much maturity and success. He poured everything he had into auditions and dedicated himself fully to an incredibly demanding rehearsal schedule all while managing his school assignments and tests. He remained focused and calm (well, mostly calm 😏), keeping his grades up - even scoring a 17/20 on a DNA Biology test the week of "go time."

   

  

   The positive connections with new friends has been an answer to prayer, and seeing him shine with so much joy and pride after every rehearsal and performance makes the late nights more than worthwhile. He's already talking about next year.

     

     Just two years ago all of this wouldn't have even been a remotely tangible possibility. He was clawing and crawling his way through the school year with an incredible amount of anxiety and frustration. His attention was so divided and limited that even managing his assignment book was difficult. We are just so amazed as we now sit back and continue to watch our Caleb "BECOME." Keep flying high, my shining star.... Show 'em what you've got. 🌟❤️🌟

(to be continued...)

"And you ask 'What if I fall?'

Oh but my darling,

What if you fly?" - Erin Hanson

Second Degree Black Belt Rank

You've come a long way, baby... Perseverance looks great on you, Caleb, and we are so proud of you. ❤️

Second Degree Black Belt *DECIDED*

81 moves successfully executed to complete his Shim Jun form.  In addition, he had to do two board breaks; flying side kick and a downward knife-hand strike.

Caleb's Taekwondo instructors are truly amazing.  They push him to be better, but are patient with his personal journey.  They’re caring and compassionate and truly go above and beyond to help every student reach their individual goals. Taekwondo has definitely been the best choice for Caleb over the years and one that we have never regretted.  We later discovered that it is one of the highest recommended sports for children with sensory issues. It checks off so many of the boxes that these kiddos need (resistive muscle activity, coordinated movement, body position and balance.) Organized team sports were too chaotic with too much movement around him. (Although he did have fun playing tag and doing cartwheels on that big shiny floor . The last 60 seconds were usually spent standing in the middle of the court watching the timer so that the buzzer wouldn't catch him off guard.  ) 

Not only has Caleb achieved Black Belt Rank under their training and instruction, but he is gaining so much more. He is learning the disciplines of hard work and perseverance, but also the value of honor, courtesy, and respect for those around him and also for himself. Second Degree Rank is right around the corner! I would recommend Martial Arts for anyone, but especially for any child with sensory or motor deficits, this is a great way to fill some of those gaps and also to help build confidence and give them a sense of accomplishment and achievement.

The journey to success may look different for everyone but one thing is certain, failure only happens the moment you decide to quit trying. #thepowerofYET

Drum Roll Please....

    
     Oh, yes he did! Beautiful way to end the week AND the quarter. 
Despite a few hiccups and personal challenges, Caleb rose above them all and finished strong. All good feedback from teachers, specifically noting consistent positive effort and participation. So proud and so very thankful!

     One thing that brings me great satisfaction is that he has begun to embrace his own academic journey.  He's advocating for himself and asking for help when needed, but he's also doing more of his work independently.  He's taking responsibility for his schedule and assignments and remembering to turn things in when they're due.  If he has needed to touch base with a teacher regarding a late or missing assignment, he did it on his own with little to no prompts from me.  These are all wonderful steps in the right direction toward a bright  and independent future.

One down, three to go! 

"I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day." 
2 Timothy 1:12

It's not all about the grades...

   

     Yesterday Caleb came home from school to tell us that he had his first test of the year coming up... TODAY.  Less than 24 hours notice for Mom to help prepare for a test that could either continue to propel him forward or derail him and cause us to lose the beautiful momentum that we've been gaining. 

     "Ok, Caleb.  No problem.  We've got this.  What do we need to study?"  Caleb promptly and confidently responded saying that he needed to label a U.S. map with all 50 states.  "Ummmm, ok and you knew about this WHEN?"  He did know about it earlier in the week, but I don't think fully understood the undertaking studying for a test like this would be.  We worked for about 2 hours, labeling maps, finding patterns to shapes of states and finding fun in the learning.  We laughed and kept things as lighthearted and stress-free as possible.  He worked so very hard and had an amazing attitude the entire time....Very low anxiety.  As we approached bedtime, and I could see he was beginning to bog down, I told him to take a shower and do his exercises and then we'd give it one more go before bed.  On his last try, without any prompts, he correctly labeled 47 of the 50 states.  With only a few obscure clues, he figured out the final three.  He was ready, he was confident and I WAS PROUD... Never has studying been this easy or fun with my kid.

     Needless to say I was waiting with bated breath to hear the results of what we were sure would be a winning score.  My extended afternoon working in my classroom only prolonged the agony, but finally it was time to go home and hear the news.  When I walked in the door, I made a beeline straight for Caleb.  "Well?  How'd you do on the test?"  He responded, "Good, but I didn't know any of the capitals so I got 20% off."  ***WHAT?***  Nowhere did either of us read that he needed to know the states AND capitals.  I looked through his binder, I looked online....NOTHING.  Ugh.  "This isn't going to be good." I thought to myself as I considered all of the possible scenarios of how he must have responded to the unexpected failure.  Years of experience had led me to believe that this could turn into a series of self-hate comments and a "Why did I even bother to try?" attitude. 

Here is the most beautiful part of it though.

He looked up at me with the sweetest smile and so very calmly said, "But it's ok, mom.  I'm ok.  I got a B.  I don't usually get those."  ***JAW DROPPED MOMENT*** What a rock star.  I spend every day instilling in my Third Grade students the importance of embracing challenges and mistakes because they help us learn.  Celebrate the failures!  Build monuments around them.  However, it's been a difficult mantra for Caleb to grasp.  His focus in the past would have gone right to the missed content, and he would have remained frozen in that place with no desire to try again.

     When I further considered his response to the whole situation, I found myself so full of gratitude.  There were several beautiful miracles to recognize along the way, and if I had been so focused on the grade and the disappointment with myself for not helping him to prepare better, I would have missed the opportunities to spot them.  To start, the panic of a night before test cram session in the past would have sent Caleb into a spiral of many meltdowns, shutdowns, tears, avoidance tactics....the list goes on.  Instead, he was ready to get to work.  He was cooperative, calm, focused and truly delightful to work with.  Secondly, for him to remember that many state names and locations in such a short amount of time was a true miracle in itself.  Soooo much going on in that little brain of his for so many years, he would easily become flooded and overwhelmed causing instant shut down.  When he woke in the morning, he was eager to go.  Head held high, smile on his face and ready to conquer the beast.  He asked if I would pray over him and out he went.  If he was nervous, I certainly didn't see it.  The final miracle I witnessed was in his response to a lower grade than expected.  He's an all or nothing kind of kid.  If his candy cane is broken, he won't eat it.  If the box to a new toy has a crease, back the store it goes.  We're working hard on that one, but it is what it is.  When he took the time to recognize that even a B is so much of an improvement from what he used to get, I realized that he's beginning to recognize the beauty in his OWN journey and he's proud of it. 
   
     Society would lead you to believe that it's all about the ribbons, awards and accolades, but today we found something much more priceless to celebrate.
What a gift for him....what a gift for ALL OF US.

Back in Action!

          Turning the page to another chapter in the story. After a much needed two years at home, Caleb is heading back to the classroom for the 9th Grade. Looking forward to a year of new adventures and tremendous growth... The staff and administration at the Intermediate High School have gone above and beyond to ensure a smooth transition and have far exceeded our expectations on all fronts. Praying for good friendships, the courage to make wise choices and opportunities for his strengths and talents to shine through as he navigates through the year.

          He loves all of his classes and likes his teachers.  His favorite class is Biology (no surprise there!).  The lab is full of all kinds of live animals which could prove to be a bit of a distraction at times, but a happy distraction, no doubt.  The counselor worked hard into the late hours one evening last week to ensure a solid schedule for him with electives that he would enjoy taking.  Woodworking, personal fitness, vocational readiness with on-campus work, video production....  Makes ME want to go back to school!  Ok, maybe not, but definitely excited for my young man.

          On his way out the door this morning for day three, he turned and said, "I think I'm going to really like school now, mom."  I said, "Caleb, I'm so glad!  That makes my heart so happy to hear that!"  He said, "Yeah, it's so much easier to concentrate and listen to my teachers now."  Then he paused and said, "Oh, and you don't have to walk me to the bus today if you don't want to.  I'm good to go on my own if that's ok."  "Yes, my dear.  It's MORE than ok," I thought to myself as I smiled and waved and a tear rolled down my cheek.  It's going to be a great year.

          Fly high, my shining star. 🌟 Show 'em what you're made of. Cheering you on all the way. ❤👊💪

"For I know whom I have believed in [with absolute trust and confidence in Him and in the truth of His deity], and I am persuaded [beyond any doubt] that He is able to keep that which I have committed to Him until that day." 2 Timothy 1:12

NO MORE MEDS!!!

     

     

   

    

     I have so very much been looking forward to sharing this news. Tomorrow marks four weeks of Caleb being medication free!!! He has been on the two prescription medications for attention and anxiety for over five years. Once we finally swallowed the pill (LITERALLY) of using medication to manage his symptoms, we really didn't see that there was an option for him to ever be off of it. In fact, it only seemed that the dosage was increasing as he grew. Earlier this year, we spoke with his psychiatrist about our desires to wean him off of the medication. It didn't come without resistance but he did agree to help us toward that end. Since beginning the Neurosensory Program with Dr. McFadden last Fall, we began seeing progress in so many areas. At the same time, we began to realize that all of these positive changes were because we were finally getting to the root of what was keeping him from reaching his potential. Years of interference to his central nervous system was literally holding him hostage in his own body and mind. My husband made the comment this past Spring that he was even becoming convinced that the program was working and with a contented sigh, said that it was so nice to begin to see and hear the REAL Caleb with no interference or obstacles in the way. As we continued to pull back on the dosage of medication, and realized there were no negative side effects, I began to also realize that our goals to eliminate medication were well within reach. When we finally decided to discontinue the prescription, I didn't say anything to Caleb about it. It was kind of comical that he didn't realize that he hadn't been taking it. After 2 weeks had gone by, I asked him if he realized that he hadn't been taking it. He immediately stopped what he was doing and looked at me wide-eyed and jaw-dropped and said, "Really? Are you sure? Huh... I guess I don't need it any more after all!" And then he smiled really, REALLY big. (and so did I...)

     I share this to say that if you're advocating for someone you love or know someone else who is, you don't have to settle.  Keep fighting, keep seeking answers and DON'T GIVE UP!  The body and mind are incredibly AMAZING and once unhindered, can function beautifully and naturally together as God designed... 

Black Belt Journey

***2nd Degree Black Belt Recommended!***  Four more months to go to complete testing for official 2nd degree rank. 

This is a link to his flying side kick and downward hammerfist board break (which he had to train using his left hand to avoid further injury to his right hand which he broke this past spring.) 

⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇⬇  

Black Belt Board Breaks.  

He also completed 3 other components of testing including his Shim Jun Form consisting of 81 moves which he will perform again in December.  The components that go into this type of testing defy all of the limitations that Caleb's diagnoses have put on him:  Balance, coordination, memory, focus, control....So proud of him and so thankful to his instructors​ at ATA in Wexford, PA for their continued dedication to Caleb's personal journey to not just achieve excellence as a martial artist, but to continually strive to be better inwardly (mentally, emotionally and physically), learning the value of hard work, respect and perseverance.  The look of accomlishment on his face said so much with NO WORDS.  Had a hard time holding back the tears!  Onward and upward!  (Stay tuned!) 👊💪  

Social Interaction Goals

 
       

          Oh, to have been a fly on the wall today.  Caleb had a unique opportunity to witness a ribbon cutting ceremony for the National Aviary's Tropical Rainforest renovation project.  It was a fairly intimate catered breakfast event attended by donors, reporters, and other members of the aviary.  Caleb's love for all animals is no secret so of course this outing today is the highlight of his week.

     
          In looking at all of the pictures though, there was one thing that stood out to me larger and louder than any other photo of him interacting with his feathered fowl friends.  It was hidden in the photos of him interacting with the docent:  Fully engaged in passionate conversation about something that they both love.  Caleb not only contributed appropriately and meaningfully to the conversation, but listened actively as the man shared his own knowledge and expertise with Caleb.

       






          That may not seem like a big deal for most, but for me, this is a beautiful representation of something that we have desired to see for so long.  When Caleb first started receiving therapeutic services about 6 years ago, one of the goals written for him was that he would be able to SUSTAIN meaningful "volleyed" conversation with another individual (adult or peer).  This meant participating in both ends of conversations; giving AND receiving and providing appropriate eye contact throughout.  No matter what goals he has met or made progress with over the years, this is one of several that has seemed to loom in the shadows of every report.  He just couldn't connect...he didn't know how.  And if he wanted to share something, he certainly wasn't able or interested in sticking around long enough to keep a conversation going.  He just wanted to share a fun fact and the matter usually stopped there.  That's really all the more his focus and attention would allow.  More recently, though, he is beginning to truly and genuinely be just as engaged in hearing what others have to contribute to a topic, and as a result is adding to his own learning, knowledge and understanding by leaps and bounds (but shhhhhh, don't tell HIM that!)
     

          So today, Caleb may be celebrating an opportunity to meet new avian friends and hold some butterflies, but as mom I see something so very different but just as beautiful... I see a continued emerging of a young man with a destiny and purpose far greater than one I can begin to imagine or hope for.  I don't know what all of this will look like another 6 years down the road, but I am fairly certain it's going to be pretty amazing.  Because this boy is pretty amazing.

Passing the Baton

     

     Self-awareness and self-advocacy are without a doubt huge components to raising any child, but especially is as important for a child on the spectrum.  Knowing what they need and being able to ask for it is a huge leap toward independence.  Tonight Caleb moved further toward that independence and self-advocacy during his reevaluation with his psychologist.  Using appropriate eye-contact and confident body posture, he was able to effectively convey the progress he has been making with his school work, emotions and behaviors.  He carried on fluid conversation with the doctor as they discussed different components to his plan of care including goals his has met and those that he's still working toward.  Even the doctor noticed how much more improved his conversation had become and asked Caleb why he thought he was doing better.  Caleb wasted no time as he began to share about all of the things that he felt were helping him to improve.  He said he was using more coping skills, making healthier options with food and said that he had been seeing "Dr. Jim" who had been helping him to feel better and do better in school.  After Caleb had talked for a while, I had the opportunity to share my perspective regarding his progress.  When I was finished sharing, he asked what I thought was contributing to such positive changes.  I told him I knew exactly what it was and began to share with him.  I shared about the neurosensory program, his diet changes and eliminating gluten and dairy, and told the doctor about the improvements he has made in school, at home and in his social skills group.  I finished with expressing the desire to have Caleb completely off of medication and his response, while not all that shocking, was disappointing.  He looked me in the eye and said, "Well, why would you want to do that?"  I said, "Why WOULDN'T we?!"  Although Caleb was able to carry the majority of the conversation, I was glad to still be there next to him so that he could hear the explanation of why we are doing what we are doing.  He KNOWS it's WORKING.  He KNOWS he's making PROGRESS, but to know that it's ok to see things differently than the doctor is important.  I want him to advocate for himself based on what is working, not on what is expected or just because it's the well-trodden path.  He's learning...  WE ALL ARE...

Peeling Back the Layers to Something Beautiful

     There is HUGE cause for celebration in our home this week and I think this smile says it all! Caleb has been putting a lot of hard work and effort into bringing up his grades. Over the course of the school year we have watched his grades climb out of the red to now having ALL PASSING GRADES! These past nine weeks, however, have shown the greatest improvement. His English/Reading grade went from a C- to an A and his Math grade went from a D to a C+. Science went from a D to a C and Social Studies climbed from a C to a B. What's even more noteworthy, though, is that at one point during this school year he was FAILING English! That's an impressive climb!

When Caleb was first diagnosed with autism and ADD, he was also diagnosed with a Mixed Receptive/Expressive Communication Disorder. Reading and writing has without a doubt presented the biggest hurdle to his academic success. He began feeling very defeated and over the years, and we've watched him slowly give up. He just stopped caring and stopped trying. That's hard to watch as a parent when you feel like you're exhausting all resources, but as a teacher it was even harder. I'm supposed to know how to fix this. We had tried every motivational tool, incentive, threat, punishment.... We just couldn't gain consistent ground.

There are a lot of things we've done with Caleb over the years that have benefited him tremendously: supplements, essential oils, occupational, physical and mobile therapies, learning support, and social skills groups.... It wasn't until this year, that we began to learn that there was a deeper issue that needed to be addressed before we could see Caleb reach his full potential. Years of interference to his central nervous system has prevented him from being free to thrive socially, emotionally and academically. He was trapped. ***WAS trapped!*** The tides have turned and it is only forward progress 

from this point on. Since beginning the Neurosensory program, we have witnessed layer by layer peel away, releasing potential that was there all along.  We are seeing the real Caleb emerge almost like a butterfly from its cocoon, and it's a beautiful thing!  

This journey is a continuing saga with many written chapters yet to be discovered.  Life is a marathon, friends, not a sprint. If you're searching for answers to something, don't give up! Keep knocking on those doors. Keep asking questions. Lean into wise counsel. Learn from your challenges and mistakes, and learn from the challenges and mistakes of others. Your answers might just be right around the corner!  

Here is a link to a much better explanation of the Neurosensory program, originally developed by Dr. Monika Buerger, which targets Neurodevelopmental Disorders such as Autism Spectrum Disorders, ADD, ADHD and Learning Disorders ...

McFadden Chiropractic's Neurosensory Program

Jumping Hurdles with Roaches?!?!

     Caleb had an opportunity today to be the "expert" and share his knowledge of the Madagascar Hissing Cockroach with four different elementary and intermediate classes. I am beyond proud of how brave he was and how seriously he took this request. Communicating his thoughts and ideas has always been a challenge for him in general, so to share so openly and confidently in this forum is a MASSIVE hurdle in every way. He researched and organized his facts and information, made appropriate eye contact as he presented and even made some jokes. And I mean who can't take a kid seriously in a lab coat!? My heart was so full today as I watched Caleb shine as I know the young man he is destined to be... TO BE CONTINUED.....

Connecting the Dots...

    
     It's not uncommon after having a chiropractic adjustment that Caleb will use some extra time during the day to rest or sleep.  His body is accepting and responding to the adjustment and that's a good thing!  After his appointment today, he had an extra long nap.  When he got up, it was almost as if someone flipped a switch.  THAT KID WENT TO WORK!  He shoveled the driveway with his dad (with a winning attitude), came in and "reset" by taking a nice hot shower, did some school assignments without hesitation, did his sensory exercises, brushed his teeth and went to bed without a fuss.  As my husband came into the bedroom to get ready for bed himself, he made the comment that days like this are without a doubt proof that the Neurosensory Program Caleb is participating in is working.  Then he took a deep breath and smiled and said, "It's nice to see and hear the REAL Caleb with no interference or obstacles in the way."  After a long pause, he said he "gets it."  THAT'S MUSIC TO MY EARS!  It has always been important for my husband and me to work as a team, but especially with regards to Caleb's care, the consistency and follow-through is critical.  If we can't see eye to eye or work together effectively, it can adversely affect much-needed progress.

     So what is there to "get in the way?"  The brain's primary purpose is to control and manage every other system in the body.  The communication between the brain and body has only one path, and that is through the central nervous system.  If there is interference within the central nervous system, that communication will be interrupted and the body and brain will not function the way they were designed to.  The spine serves the function of protecting the nervous system.  If any part of the spine is out of place, it puts pressure on the nerves, causing the body and brain to be out of sync.  With routine, specific and gentle adjustments, those areas of interference can be corrected, reestablishing communication between the brain and body.  That is an essential ingredient in the recipe for a happy, strong and confident boy!!!

Not all days are as smooth sailing and seemingly perfect as this one, but we are having more and more of these days.  And, after so many years of having mostly battle line-drawn days, this is a refreshing wind of change!

BIG Changes

    The middle of the school year is a great time to reflect on growth, reassess strategies and tools for learning and reorganize goals for the months ahead.  For us, this has usually meant recognizing that we were really seeing more of the same, spinning our wheels gaining little ground.  Since Caleb was first diagnosed, we have sought to provide support that would not only help him academically, but also help to bring fewer outbursts of anger and frustration, less anxiety, and greater attention and focus.  One of my heart's greatest desires has been for his confidence to grow.  

     I am not exaggerating when I say that there were times that Caleb would ask us if we wished he was never born, or he would even go so far as to say HE wished he was never born.  He would threaten to hurt himself, threaten to run away or would just completely shut down.  This is a heartbreaking thing to hear and witness as a mom.  The helpless and hopeless look in his eyes would cause tears to fill mine.  I would have borne the weight of it all for him if I could, but that's not how it works....

     This school year, however, is different.  Throughout the past few months, we have already been seeing some great progress for ourselves at home, and have been over the moon thrilled with the feedback we have received from his therapists and other family members. He's been less reactionary, more content, more confident and more connected.  He's taken ownership of his own nutrition and has been diligent to do Dr. Jim's "exercise homework assignments."  He's doing school work more independently and his grades are climbing out of the red.  Even better yet, we have already begun reducing the dosage of his medication and anticipate one day being medication free!!!!  The best gift so far, though, is the smile I see on that face.  Happy and carefree, beginning to enjoy his own journey the way that every kid should.

     Even if you feel like you're at the end or your rope, don't give up!  Keep asking questions, keep knocking on those doors.  Keep seeking wise counsel.  Learn from the triumphs and mistakes of those around you.  Your answers are out there!  We are thankful for ALL the support Caleb has received over the years.  Each therapist and educational support teacher has been sent by God for their divine time, purpose and place.  Thankful for all we have learned over the years and the tools that we have received to support Caleb at home.  However, some of what we have done has just been putting a band-aid on a wound that would likely never fully heal.  We weren't addressing the problem at its root.  We are now digging deep to get rid of anything that is keeping him from reaching his fullest potential and performing at his best... FEELING HIS BEST.....  SMILING ALL THE WHILE.  My heart is full, and I know we've only just begun.